Last Stand for The Stand

I returned from a wonderful vacation in DC, Baltimore and Rehoboth Beach. I had a great time and thanks to all the friends who made it possible. One of the first things I did on my return was to re-assess the condition of my battered copy of Stephen King's The Stand.



I decided I would read at least the first 50 pages of this book, a favorite of mine since my teens. To my dismay, when I opened the copy I discovered that the first 15 pages were missing.



I immediately made the decision - as much as I love this book, this copy was decrepit and incomplete. It had been read probably dozens of times by me, my ex-girlfriend and friends to which we lent it. It was time for it to die a grisly and honorable end on my compost heap. Not put there out of hate, but out of love.



As I covered it over with rich compost I wondered how long before I turned it over with my spade and discovered its rotting, worm-eaten pages. Would it grow there in my compost heap into something shambling and horrible?

It's raining tonight in Austin, Texas, and I think I hear something squealching around outside my door . . .

Will the Next Compost Book be The Stand by Stephen King

I have very fond memories of this book. It was one of my favorite books growing up. The copy I have is not the first I read, it may have belonged to an old girlfriend. This copy has been in my possession at least a decade.

While I don't read horror genre books or King anymore, I still have respect for this book. It's epic, effective and I always thought the ending was perfect. King understands that the existence of dark supernatural forces suggests the existence of good, or at least sort of good. As I have grown older I have more respect for the Old Testament worldview so maybe I should give The Stand a read again.

But this is not the copy to do it with. It's old, falling apart. It's time for it to go and I can't imagine this copy being purchased by anyone or surviving any kind of transit. It might not make it to the compost pile. I will try to post pics of the damaged book tomorrow and may possibly compost then as well. If I do not compost then, I will do so when I return from vacation on July 28.

Retiring this Index

The index to the right has changed. This is the old Index retired today.

COMPOST BOOKS 2008 PRESIDENTIAL WINNABILITY INDEX

DEMS

Mark Warner (VA) 77
Wes Clark (AR) 73
Hillary Clinton (NY) 42
John Edwards (NC) 38
Tom Vilsack (IA) 28

GOP

Condoleeza Rice (CA) 120
Haley Barbour (MS) 83
Mitt Romney (MS) 76
Tim Pawlenty (MN) 76
Rudy Giuliani (NY) 31
Fred Thompson (TN) 30
Chuck Hagel (NE) 29
Bill Frist (TN) 27
Mike Huckabee (AR) 27
Sam Brownback (KS) 27
Mark Sanford (SC) 20

City Wars by Dennis Palumbo was Laid to Rest in the Compost Pile Yesterday

Let this .jpg serve as a sort of first eulogy for this terrible novel.



Now let this .jpg serve as second eulogy for a thoroughly depressing and boring stab at 70s leftie post-apocalypse sci-fi thriller.




At approximately 5:15 p.m. on Saturday, July 9, 2005, I dug a ~14" hole in the center of my compost pile. I placed a layer of melon rinds, strawberry tops, stale generic raisin bran cereal and black castings at the bottom of the pit. I laid my battered copy of City Wars by Dennis Palumbo at the bottom.



I then filled in the grave with probably about 11" of compost, then an inch or so of grass clippings. I then lay a touching bouquet of purple flowers as a final memorial to an unreadable book.



I am strangely unmoved and empty, but I will gather some thoughts and post them within a few days.

I Will Place City Wars by Dennis Palumbo in the Compost Heap Tomorrow

"He found himself wishing he'd broken his own combat rule and taken aboard a kilo of crazydust . . . The crazydust could have pushed him over the edge."

Dennis Palumbo is the sort of sci-fi writer who creates a dreary, nihilistic apocalypse-world and stocks it with characters who use a drug called crazydust.

His terrible book will be placed within my compost heap later today. I will dust the front cover with black castings and shovel compost over it. For the next few months, the book will slowly decay and rot. Then in the spring, I will sift rich compost over my lawn. And so my enemy, a book so bad I put it in my compost pile, will die and then serve me.

Check later for pictures, and possibly an announcement regarding the next compost book.